Parshas Chayei Sara 5767

Commentary by Rabbi Ephraim Nisenbaum

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Sarah died at 127 years old. She retained her exalted spiritual nature and physical beauty until her very last day. Although she had lived a tumultuous life by any standard--traveling around with her husband, being abducted twice, childless until ninety years old--she maintained her dignity and trust in G-d throughout every difficulty.

Abraham wanted to bury Sarah in the Cave of Machpela, where Adam and Eve had both been buried. He approached Efron the Chittite to purchase the area from him.

Abraham was well respected among the other nations. Efron seemed to treat him quite generously, offering Abraham the cave and the surrounding field at no charge. Abraham, however, insisted on paying the full price for the area. Efron exploited Abraham, and charged him 400 silver shekels, an exorbitant sum of money, for the plot. (Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan’s "Living Torah" cites Hammurabi’s Code that an average worker’s yearly salary then was between 6-8 silver shekels.) The Rabbis see in Efron the idea that those who speak much do not usually deliver very much.

After Sarah’s passing, Abraham occupied himself with finding a suitable wife for his son, Isaac. He sent his trusted servant Eliezer to his homeland to find the woman who would be fit to fill the role as Matriarch of the Jewish people. He did not want his son to marry a Canaanite woman because he felt that the character traits of the Canaanites could not fit into the plan for the future Jewish people.

Eliezer sought a woman who would personify the trait of loving kindness. He decided to test the potential candidate by asking her for a drink of water. If she would offer water not only for him, but for his camels too, Eliezer would know that she was truly a kindhearted person. Rebecca, Abraham’s great-niece, passes Eliezer’s test. Isaac married her and saw that the blessings and the aura of holiness that had personified his mother’s home were also present in his new wife, and he was comforted from the loss of his mother.

After Isaac married, and the foundation for the future of the Jewish people was in place, Abraham remarried and had more children. The Midrash relates that he actually remarried Hagar, now called Keturah.

After a long and fruitful life Abraham passed away at 175 years old. He too was buried next to his wife, in the Cave of Machpela.

“Yitzchak was comforted on the loss of his mother...” (Gen. 24:67)

Comforting the mourner is a great mitzvah, though many people find it uncomfortable to fulfill.

Rav Matisyahu Solomon, the famed Mashgiach of Lakewood Yeshiva, is one of the busiest men around. Besides his many weekly classes and involvement in communal matters, many throughout the world also seek his counsel. He once heard about a young father who passed away. He did not know the man personally, but he decided to pay a call to the family.

The seven-year-old son was having a very difficult time dealing with his loss. Rav Solomon confided to the boy, “I lost my father when I was seven years old, too. We can have a special club, the Seven Club, if you like. You can call me whenever you need to speak to someone. Just say you’re calling from the Seven Club, and I will be available to speak to you.”

Despite his grueling schedule, Rav Solomon would give the boy as much time as he wanted to speak, helping to ease the boy’s difficulties.

Did You Know...

It is customary to cover all the mirrors during the shiva, the seven days in a house of mourning. Several reasons are offered for this tradition. One reason is to discourage personal grooming, much of which is prohibited during the shiva period. Another reason is to spare the mourner the additional pain of seeing his own grief-stricken face.

Yet another reason is that prayer services are held in the house. It is prohibited to pray in front of a mirror so that it will not appear that one is praying to an image, and in order to prevent distraction during the prayers.