Parshas Vayeshev 5768

Commentary by Rabbi Ephraim Nisenbaum

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The roots of all Jewish history can be traced to the story of our forefathers and their families. In the story of Joseph and his brothers the roots of the Egyptian exile and the ultimate Redemption can be seen.

Jacob favored his son Joseph more than his other sons. He taught him individually and made him a special colorful garment. This incurred the jealousy of his brothers. It was compounded further when Joseph related his prophetic dreams about his leadership to his brothers. Although the Talmud finds fault with Jacob’s treatment of Joseph, his intentions were to prepare Joseph for the challenges he would have to endure before assuming leadership.

The brothers eventually conspired to kill Joseph. They first threw him into a pit, but then decided to sell him instead as a slave. They took Joseph’s coat, dipped it in blood, and sent it to their father, implying that he had been attacked by an animal. Jacob could not be consoled. The brothers obviously acted improperly, however, their actions were also part of an orchestrated masterplan from G-d to set the stage in Egypt for the family’s eventual exile.

Yehuda, the born leader of the brothers, and the one most affected by Joseph’s dreams, started his own family. His first son, Er, died, and Yehuda had the widow, Tamar, marry his second son, Onan. Onan also died and Yehuda sent Tamar to her father’s home. However, Tamar desired to have children through Yehuda’s family, and in a strange turn of events she fooled Yehuda into living with her. Yehuda did not even realize that he had made her pregnant. When confronted with the realization of what he had done, Yehuda publicly admitted to his actions, accepting full responsibility. Tamar bore to Yehuda twin boys, Zerach and Peretz, who would be the forbearer of the Davidic and Messianic, dynasty.

Meanwhile, Joseph was taken to Egypt where he was a servant in the house of one of Pharaoh’s officers, Potiphar. Joseph was very handsome, and Potiphar’s wife tried to seduce Joseph, but he would not consent, despite all her efforts. As a result, she slandered Joseph and he was sent to prison, where he remained for eleven years.

Jacob’s efforts in preparing Joseph paid off, though. Regardless of all the difficult circumstances he found himself in, Joseph maintained a positive disposition. This virtue would be of great importance when Joseph would later assume a leadership role.

...He commanded us to kindle the lights of Chanukah (Chanukah blessing)

A man approached Rav Yitzchak Zilberstein with a question. He owned a beautiful silver menorah he would light each year for Chanukah. This year, however, his son had won a new menorah at school for his diligence in Torah study. The menorah was obviously not as nice as the one at home, but the son would really appreciate if his father would light the prize menorah. The father inquired if it would be preferable to use the nicer menorah, or the prize menorah.

Rav Zilberstein answered that the menorah is meant to publicize the miracle of the Maccabees’ victory over the Greeks, who wanted to abolish the Torah. What greater victory is there than to publicize a young boy’s diligence in Torah more than 2000 years after the Greeks tried to destroy that same Torah? The father should definitely light the prize menorah.

Did You Know...

One should first light the shamash, the candle used to kindle the other candles, recite all the blessings and then begin kindling the Chanukah candles. If one of the wicks does not catch, or if the flame was extinguished right after lighting, it should be fixed or replaced, but no new blessing is required. There are different customs regarding the singing of Haneiros halalu and the other Chanukah hymns. Some sing them immediately after the first candle has been lit, while kindling the other candles, while others begin singing after all the candles have been lit.

Parshas Vayishlach 5768

Commentary by Rabbi Ephraim Nisenbaum

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On the way home from Laban’s house, Jacob received word that Esau was coming towards him with an army of 400 men. He understood that Esau’s hatred had not yet abated since thirty-four years earlier, when they had last seen each other.

Jacob prepared for his meeting with Esau in three ways: He first sent a gift to Esau, he prayed to G-d for assistance, and he planned a military strategy.

The gift was meant to appease Esau’s enmity. Jacob wanted to show that he would share his material success with Esau, and that he was not trying to usurp his brother’s blessing for his own material gain. Yet Jacob was realistic too. In the event that Esau would not be placated by the gift, Jacob realized he must prepare for war. He divided his camp into two parts. If one camp would be attacked, the other would always be able to flee to safety, thus ensuring Jacob’s survival.

But even after both of these precautions were taken, Jacob realized that salvation was dependent upon the Al-mighty. He therefore prayed for G-d’s protection from the dangers of Esau.

Jacob’s concern about his future was a valid one. The night before the meeting, after taking his family across the river, Jacob returned to retrieve some small pitchers he had forgotten behind. While alone, an angel fought with Jacob until morning. The Talmud identifies this angel as the spiritual force of Esau. The struggle actually foreshadowed the physical meeting Jacob would encounter the next day with Esau. The angel could not win over Jacob, but he did wound Jacob’s thigh. The commentators understand the symbolism of the thigh as a reference to Jacob’s children, thereby threatening Jacob’s survival. Jacob would not let the angel go until he blessed him. This was Esau’s admission and recognition of Jacob’s rights to their father’s blessings. The angel named Jacob “Israel”, meaning that he was victorious in his quest over the angel.

The following day Esau did have a change of heart and let Jacob return home in peace.

Jacob’s challenges were not yet over, though. The prince, Shechem, violated his daughter Dinah, leading to Shimon and Levi’s destroying the entire city. Later, Rachel, his wife, died in childbirth shortly before he returned home. Jacob decided to bury her near Bethlehem, instead of in Chevron with the other Patriarchs and Matriarchs. He wanted to allow his descendants to be able to pray by her tomb during their exile from Jerusalem. Rachel’s tomb remains a special place to pray for our needs until this day.

“Dinah, the daughter of Leah, whom she had borne to Jacob went out to look...”(Gen. 34:1)

The Talmud explains that Dinah acted somewhat immodestly, resulting in her violation at the hands of Shechem. Rav Yerucham Levovitz once observed a group of university students walking to their classes. He noticed the flirtatious behavior between the young men and women. “Look at that,” he exclaimed, “ These people’s behavior has no effect whatsoever on their academic achievements, as many of them will be quite accomplished. Yet, we can see how even one inappropriate glance at something immodest can be extremely destructive to one’s Torah study and prayer. Do we need any other proof to the Divine origin of Torah?”

Did you know...

One should make every effort to light the Chanukah candles at the proper time, and not earlier or later. Most authorities rule that one should light within a half hour after sunset. If one will not be at home all evening, he may light after plag Mincha, which is approximately an hour before sunset during the winter months, however, the candles must be able to burn until a half hour after the proper time for lighting. If one cannot come home at the proper time, he may still light the entire evening, as long as there are passersby on the street. If one will not return until very late, he may still light if there is someone else in the house who can view the candles. One who is inn transit should appoint a messenger to light on his behalf.

Parshas Vayetze 5768

Commentary by Rabbi Ephraim Nisenbaum

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Jacob left his parents’ home to escape from his brother Esau’s wrath, and to find a wife from his mother’s family, as well.

On his way to Charan, Jacob stopped to sleep at the mountain of Moriah, the same spot that Abraham had brought Isaac as a sacrifice. He dreamed about a ladder reaching from earth up to the heavens. G-d spoke to him from above the ladder, and promised Jacob that He would accompany him throughout his exile, and that eventually he would return to the Land of Canaan with his children. The ladder represented Jacob’s mission of bridging the spiritual world he had enjoyed until this point, and the physical world he would encounter in the house of his uncle, the deceptive Laban.

In Laban’s house, Jacob had to overcome many difficult challenges. He offered to work seven years for Rachel, Laban’s younger daughter’s hand in marriage. Laban tricked Jacob into marrying his older daughter, Leah. Jacob had to work another seven years in order to marry Rachel. Although Jacob loved Leah, he did harbor some resentment towards her because of her involvement in this deception.

G-d saw Leah’s pain and allowed her to bear children, immediately, unlike any of the other three Matriarchs. This endeared her to Jacob. She bore him a total of six sons, Reuben, Simon, Levi, Judah; and then later, Yissachar, and Zevulun. She also bore Jacob a daughter, Dinah.

Rachel saw that she could not yet bear children, so she gave her maidservant Bilhah to Jacob as a concubine. Bilhah bore Jacob two more sons, Gad and Asher. Leah also gave her maidservant Zilpah as a concubine to Jacob. She too bore him two sons, Dan and Naftali. Finally, Rachel conceived, and she bore Jacob a son, Joseph. Later, on the road back to Canaan, she bore him another son, Benjamin, but she died during childbirth.

Laban tried to cheat Jacob out of his hard earned wages. Jacob had to make numerous deals with Laban in order to receive his fair pay. Even then, only through miraculous intervention could Jacob stop Laban from cheating him.

After twenty years in the house of Laban, Jacob spoke to his wives, and decided to return to his parents’ home in Canaan. He tried to leave secretly, but Laban learned of the escape and caught up with Jacob’s camp. Eventually, the two made peace with one another, and Jacob left peacefully. The peace was short-lived, however, as Jacob received word that Esau was awaiting his return with an army of four hundred men.

All these circumstances helped prepare Jacob with the fortitude he needed to be able to build the Jewish nation.

…Jacob departed from Beer Sheva… (Gen. 28:10)

Rav Itzikel of Brod was pushed out of his position as rabbi of the community. Before he left, the community hosted a farewell reception for the rabbi where they praised him lavishly.

Rav Itzikel responded by citing Rashi’s comment that a righteous person’s departure leaves a mark. It seems that the righteous person’s presence is only felt once he leaves.

Rav Yitzchak Hutner commented similarly that the word “leviyah” which means to connect or accompany is often used to denote a departure, such as a funeral, which is called a levaya, since we accompany the deceased to the final resting place. He explained that unfortunately, one often feels a connection only after the passing of a person. .

Did You Know…

Throughout the week after the wedding it is customary to invite family and friends to special meals with the bride and groom. If there are ten men present, the Sheva Berachos (seven blessings recited at the wedding ceremony) are recited for the couple. It must be the first wedding of either the bride or the groom in order to recite the Sheva Berachos. At least one of those present may not have attended the wedding, as his presence now increases the joy of the bride and groom. On Shabbos the blessings may be recited even if there nobody new present.

Parshas Toldos 5768

Commentary by Rabbi Ephraim Nisenbaum

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Of the three forefathers, Isaac is discussed the least in the Torah. His nature seems to have been more reserved and introverted. His contribution to the Jewish nation was his self-sacrifice to G-d and self-discipline rather than in his relationship to his fellow man. This was symbolized by one of Isaac’s few activities mentioned in the Torah, his digging and re-digging of wells, implying an internal analysis of his own character, rather than reaching out to others.

Isaac was somewhat removed in his relationship with his children. In the Torah’s description of the two sons, Jacob, the younger twin, is portrayed as the more righteous one, whose days were spent in the tent, in spiritual pursuit. Esau, on the other hand, is seen as a more hedonistic person, spending his time in the fields and pursuing physical pleasures. This would eventually lead him to turn his back on all that he had seen in his father’s house and live a life of wickedness.

Yet, despite their disparate natures, Isaac seemed to value Esau’s character and potential for greatness more than he did that of Jacob’s. Esau was able to mislead his father by asking him various questions about Jewish Law. Rebecca, however, saw through the facade and recognized the true nature of her sons. She oversaw her sons’ interaction to ensure that Jacob not be taken advantage of by Esau’s wiliness.

Even as a young man, Esau proved his scorn for the spiritual world by selling his birthright to Jacob in exchange for a pot of beans. Isaac was not aware of this sale. Many years later, Isaac wanted to give his blessings to Esau. He asked Esau to prepare a good meal for him, to be able to be in the proper frame of mind to offer his blessings.

Rebecca overheard Isaac’s plans and realized that Jacob deserved these blessings, not Esau. Even before her sons had been born, she had received the word of G-d that her younger son would more deserving of G-d’s blessings. In practice, Esau had forfeited the blessings long before by his behavior and by selling his birthright to Jacob. She encouraged Jacob to disguise himself, covering his arms and neck with goatskins to appear hairier than he really was, and pose as Esau, to receive the blessings from his father. Jacob reluctantly followed his mother’s orders. Rebecca prepared a meal for her husband and gave it to Jacob to serve Isaac.

Isaac did not recognize Jacob, and blessed him. When Esau discovered that Jacob had deceived Isaac to receive his blessings, he vowed to take revenge. However, when Isaac learned about the circumstances leading to Jacob’s deceit, he realized his mistake and agreed that the blessings would remain with Jacob.

Jacob was forced to flee from Esau’s wrath, and would not return home for another thirty-six years.

…lest my father feel me and I will be in his eyes like a deceiving person . . . (Gen. 27:12)

A man called Rabbi Nosson Scherman to relay a personal experience. He had wanted to purchase a hat, and he had tried to bargain the storeowner. The owner explained what his profit was on the hat, and that he couldn’t charge him any lower price. The customer understood and paid for the hat.

A couple days later the storeowner called the customer and said that he had just received the bill from his supplier, and he realized that the hat had not cost him as much as he had originally thought. Since he had already told the customer what his profit margin was, he would return the extra profit to the customer.

The man was amazed at the owner’s honesty. Rabbi Scherman replied, “Isn’t it a shame how we get so excited about somebody who merely does the right thing and keeps his word?”

Did You Know...

Many people have the tradition to bless their children Friday night before the meal. Some put both hands on the child’s head, while some only place one hand on the child’s head, so as to differentiate between this blessing and the priestly blessing, where both hands are raised. Although the priestly blessing is generally recited, one may offer other personal blessings too.

Candle lighting time Friday evening is considered a propitious time to pray for one’s children, and many mothers will use that time to pray for their children’s material and spiritual success.

Parshas Chayei Sara 5768

Commentary by Rabbi Ephraim Nisenbaum

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Sarah died at 127 years old. Her death proved to be an additional challenge for Abraham. After all he had gone through to prove his allegiance and love for G-d, he now had to maintain faith and dignity in the face of tragedy.

Although G-d had promised the land of Canaan to Abraham, it was not yet his. Abraham had to deal with the Hittites to purchase a burial spot for his wife in the Cave of Machpelah in Hebron. Although the Hittites offered him the cave as a gift, he insisted on buying it. He did not want to remain beholden to them. Later, they sold him the land for an exorbitant sum of money.

Shortly after Sarah’s passing, Abraham occupied himself with finding a wife for his son Isaac. This was necessary to set the scene for the next stage in the development of the Jewish people. Abraham would not allow his son to marry the daughters of Canaan, because of the bad character traits that seemed to be prevalent among them, and he was afraid these traits would be passed on to his descendants. Yet, because Isaac had been sanctified earlier, when G-d had commanded Abraham to bring him as a sacrifice, he was not allowed to leave the Land of Canaan. Like an animal sacrifice, he could not be removed from Jerusalem. Abraham therefore entrusted his servant, Eliezer, to find a wife from his own family in Aram Naharayim.

Eliezer searched for a woman of exemplary character to complement his master’s son. He decided on a test to tell if a woman was truly a kindhearted person. He would ask her to draw him some water to drink from the well. If she would draw for him and also offer to water his camels, it would prove she was truly a compassionate person and deserving of marrying Isaac. Eliezer then prayed to G-d that he should be successful in fulfilling his mission.

Rebecca fulfilled Eliezer’s request and offered to water his camels and find lodging for them to sleep. Eliezer was overjoyed and presented gifts to Rebecca before even asking her father’s permission that she return with him. The wonder of finding such a generous and sensitive woman so soon after he had prayed, encouraged his faith that G-d had answered his prayers.

The Torah says that after Isaac married Rebecca and brought her to his tent, he was comforted from the loss of his mother. The Talmud explains that as long as Sarah had lived, her candles remained lit from one Shabbos to the next. There was also a blessing in her dough, and an aura of holiness hovering over her tent. When Sarah died, these symbols ceased. With Rebecca’s appearance they returned once again. Rebecca had proven to be a worthy successor to Sarah.

...let him give it to me for its full price... (Gen. 23:9)

The Brisker Rav once spent a few days at a hotel after celebrating his son’s wedding. When he was about to leave he asked the owner for the bill. The man was honored to host the Rav and refused to accept payment. The Rav, however, refused to accept the favor and insisted on paying. He later explained to a family member, “One is always going to pay. The most inexpensive form of payment is money!”

Did You Know...

Arranging a match for purposes of marriage is legally comparable to brokering a deal between two parties, and the person arranging the match is thus entitled to collect a fee. If a number of people were involved, the fee is shared between the parties. If the person is a close friend or relative and is arranging the match out of kindness rather than as a profession, no payment is necessary. If one is unsure of the intent, and he is uncomfortable asking, he need not pay anything unless the shadchan (the arranger) asks for compensation.